Beyond Two-Four

Being a gear whore, I expect absolute perfection from sellers. Not really. But nothing drives me crazier in my whoring endeavors than poorly written and horribly conveyed solicitations for used gear. Lousy grammar and spelling are one thing, but incompetently listed classifieds deserve only shock and revulsion.

Today’s Faulknerian masterpiece comes from my local Craigslist. It reads:

Subject: Drums – $600
Description:
much see compete set 13 piece hi hat etc
nice kit
call XXX XXXX

 Here’s a suggested rewrite:

Subject: [Barely used Tama Imperialstar] Drum [Kit, Beautiful Marble Grey, only] $600

Complete kit with cymbals and hardware. Drum sizes are:
(list with actual drum dimensions in inches)
Cymbals are:
(list sizes, types and brand(s))
Hardware:
(list)

Condition: Drums are in (state condition). The kick drum has minor scuffs where the pedal attaches (see pics), etc. Cymbals are in (insert condition). The hardware is dusty and there are scratches and dings from normal use.

I’m selling the kit because (state reason). I purchased it in (insert date) and have only played live with it three times. It’s been in my practice room since. The drums sound amazing. You may come by to see them and play them after normal work hours. I will throw in four pairs of free drumsticks to the buyer who pays cash for asking price.

Call me at (number with area code) or send me an email at (email).

[insert good-quality, in-focus images]

Let’s break this down in detail. Here’s the exact steps of how such an ad can be written for increasing potential interest:

1. Write a descriptive and compelling headline

2. State exactly what’s being sold. Keep in mind, a 13-piece kit means 13 drums, not 13 pieces of drums, hardware, cymbals and pieces of broken drumsticks on the practice room floor. Lists, like this one you’re reading, help and can break up reading larger blocks of text.

3. State the precise condition. Qualify things you do not know (i.e., “there may be other scuffs in the finishing that I haven’t noticed”). Lying or misleading is not worth the later headache.

4. Give the known history of the gear. Be honest.

5. Offer for potential buyers to view and/or sample the gear in person.

6. Offer an incentive. There’s loads of research about how incentives motivate buyer behavior. The more enticing, the better.

7. Provide convenient contact information–and respond to messages within 24 hours.

Follow these pointers and your selling transactions will go smoother. The more questions you answer up front, the less you’ll have to answer later. Giving more detail is better than less. And quick follow-through will only send the message that you’re really in the business of selling. Good luck.